The blog name should be changed to "High School Reference Blog."
Good to see we have two new followers. The first, Scotty, has a pic resembling little Scotty. Scotty is the neighbor of a couple frequent readers. He is a pudgy, little lad with tussable hair. Too bad his innocence has been taken by his two creepy neighbors. I won't mention the creeps' names, but one of them plays online hold 'em for hours, while the other has driven through a drive-thru in reverse.
Very glad to see the other new follower, "Mertzisadime." I thought there was an outside shot he was Dodongo, but I know only one person would reference Mertz. I can cross one more name off the Dodongo conspiracy list. You have a gorgeous, artistic pic as well. It looks like it was drawn by a boy with an extra chromosome and a Pete Rose haircut. I'm ashamed to admit, but I have scrapped to Mertz before. As you all know, I could easily be called the "Geography Kid,", and sometimes geographic proximity plays a large role in possible jack victims. Plus, she was the hottest girl in Turner, land of the 3.5.
Pleasure to have ya on board.
You appear to be getting quite the following here, young Chipotle. Your skills are being respected, and rightfully so. How will you be celebrating this Christmas holiday?
ReplyDeleteI appreciate the kind words. I know you weren't a big fan of my "Ho, Ho, Ho" post, but of all the crazy shit I have written on here, that post was probably the most legit. Maybe it will garnish more respect now that you know it wasn't a fabrication.
ReplyDeleteI will be getting a massage for sure, and I'll see where it goes from there. Can't really know how far the girl is willing to go until you get in there. Many of them say, "Professional, no 'extra' services offered, don't ask!" That is never true, they all have their price.
CK,
ReplyDeleteIt's a pleasure to see you're in good form leading up to the holidays. May god bless you and your sole at this special time of the year. As someone who appreciates inside jokes and weird humor, I have found your posts to be spiritual.
Funny, I have yet to see a Tecmo Super Bowl reference in your musings...However, the Asia tales are enough to get me through the long Kansas winter. Talk about the gift that keeps on giving! Young Asia certainly had your number. Kind of like the time you dialed your own number to prank TK.
Dear Delilah -
ReplyDeleteFor all of us lacking your recall of the high school glory days (and the mind-boggling cheetah facts), please clue us in on the (possible) identities for mertzy, zelda, dodongo and co.
Sincerely,
Avid Reader
Mertz- You son of gun. Leave poor TK out of this. You know that is the only thing in this world that truly bothers me. Tecmo is depressing too though, the Rabbi had my number as much as Asia.
ReplyDeleteAvid-Sorry, not much help here. I know who Mertz and Zelda are but it is up to them to reveal themselves. I still don't know who Dodongo is but I have a few guesses.
Btw, why don't you reveal and lead by example instead of signing, Avid Reader?
Dear Avid Reader,
ReplyDeleteLet me introduce myself. My name is Scotty 2Hottie. Im 12, play xbox, and fuck on the first date. That is all you need to know.
I know who Scotty is, but I am unsure of Beaker still. I have a pretty good idea though. Once Dodongo is revealed then all the pieces will fall into place.
ReplyDeleteThere is one anonymous comment(Matt Mcconaughey) that screams out a certain person to me. Tough to be sure though when I haven't spoke to people in so long. I forget that everyone else has blossomed into grown men, while I'm still the same knuckle dragger as always.
For some of us, the blog is the only option you have left us, old friend.
ReplyDeleteIt's like that episode of "Saved By the Bell" where Zack just wants a relationship with his dad, but his dad is too busy cutting deals and wearing suspenders. In the middle of a heated discussion in Zack's room about a ski trip, Mr. Morris gets a phone call that he "has to take." (Camera zooms to a close-up of Mr. Morris). Suddenly, he gets another call on call waiting. (Here's the best part) "It's Zack. This is the only way I know to get through to you, dad." Do you guys get it? It was fucking Zach calling him from the same room! He knew his dad would take the call! I would cut off my left pinky right now to have been in the writers' room when that gem got thrown out on the table. Pure gold.
Damn good metaphor Dodongo. I remember that epi well.
ReplyDeleteCK,
ReplyDeleteI apologize in advance for poor grammer and lack of punctuation. I had to add the app to my phone so I can be even more unproductive during my day. The brief drive thru comment really got my memory going. I am hoping that you could revisit some of the highlights. Ice cream for my balls has always been my favorite. I miss the time I used to spend with the juice.
How could anyone not miss the Jew??? He was the apple of my eye. I would love to discuss the drive-thru greatness, but there is no way I could do it justice. The ice cream on the balls line is still to this day the hardest I have ever laughed.
ReplyDeleteIF you would like to be reminded of more Jew great moments...
The time he read the "goiter" book and got Sara Glenn out of bed.
The time we got paintball guns and we all agreed that we wouldnt use them while the car was moving. The jew was driving us and it took him about two blocks to start blowin up cars.
An obscure one that I love. When he had his mini van and he would get so mad when someone would shut the back door because he wanted to do it while driving. He would always say, "I got it."
And finally when he "accidentally" stabbed Fluffy, what a way to end your senior year.
RIP Casey, you were the best and will be missed.
Hey Dodongo,
ReplyDeleteI am pretty sure I know who you are. I wanted to ask you about something I know you would appreciate. I read an amazing book called, "Born to Run." Among other things, it discusses the Leadville Trail 100 and the Badwater Ultramarathon. Google those 2 things if you have not heard of them already and let me know what you think. I thought 26 miles was bad enough. The book even got my fatass obsessed with running.
how about these tales from the maurie stories:
ReplyDelete- "hey frankie ... you're fat."
- somehow convincing that gabe dude to huck a pie at gibbons
- the time he was sitting in photography class, bent over the table with head in the crook of his elbow and let loose the most rancid fart of all time and then, as the room broke for cover, lifted his head ever so briefly to show us his evil grin.
- ed lewis. says it all.
Mooby Tuesday
This is all I see when I read Mooby's comments...
ReplyDeleteI used to live on Delmar Lane.
I used to live on Delmar Lane.
I used to live on Delmar Lane.
I used to live on Delmar Lane.
I used to live on Delmar Lane.